An open letter to the cheap f*!ks of craigslist

Dear sir/madame/miscreant, First of all I have to say that your shared sense of entitlement baffles me from the bridezillas bragging about their budgets and then not wanting to pay for basics like “save the date cards” to the overbearing bat mitzvah throwers and trollops masquerading as working girls I can’t get over how every last one of you seems to believe that you’re somehow owed my services. Fuck you. Fuck you all. There’s not one among you who’d be brazen enough to go into a store and demand services for free (or who knows maybe you would) and yet behind your computer screens you become bold with demands. How dare you. Shame on you. Shame on you all. I’d be less bitter if you were honest, if you said up front that you had no money or maybe crafted a particularly creative sob story. But what sets you apart from all of the other scammers is that in the beginning you appear different. In the first messages you entertain offers of negotiation for actual money (and not bullshit like credit in your wedding program-seriously). And then you disappear when you see actual dollar amounts. I reiterate fuck you. Fuck you all. Like most people, this economy has made things rough for me and mine and yet rather than beg for handouts I’ve taken it upon myself to take on extra work, to make the most of my talents and embrace my entrepreneurial spirit and basically you bitches seem to not realize that I have no interest in working for you (or for anyone else) for free. So find someone else to take your tacky ass shopping or create centerpieces for your event. Find someone else and pass of their amazing ideas for your own. And have the decency to show your true colors up front.