58 comments for “Rant 030: What The F*$%^ Are You Doing In A Gay Club If You’re Not Gay?”
So… if you can elbow a strait person in the face for being in a gay bar, can I elbow you in the face if you go to a strait bar? Oh… wait, wait wait… that’s right, there is no such thing as a strait bar… that would be sexist. This is called the world. You share it with many different people who have as much right to be here as you do. IJS…
It’s great! I really like your webpage. Those are actually topics people are only talking about at home…privately. It’s a good way to think about those topics and our everyday life in society. Keep on!
P.S. Great video quality and awesome actors – makes the webisode even better!
So you hate it when you get discriminated against for being gay and hate it when straight people don’t want yo uin their bars yet you feel its OK to discriminate against straight people in gay bars? Sounds hypocritical to me. People like you make it hard for straight people to accept the notion that gays want equal rights. No wonder they accuse gays of wanting special rights, not equal rights.
I’m so glad that this rant is on here.
If I see another straight guy trying to “change” the chicks at a gay bar-I’ll freak.
Bob-All bars ARE straight bars,except for the few little bars that gays can go.Plus why would we go to a straight bar?THAT’S THE POINT OF HAVING A GAY BAR!
ok first its straight, not strait like the body of water. and second consider the fact that about 80-90 percent of the united states identify themselves as heterosexual, then consider the assumption that when you see someone they are automatically considered straight. there are straight bars, every bar or club is a ‘straight’ bar… unless it is classified as a gay bar. so maybe having a place where people of a minority can meet other people in that minority is a helpful thing. oh and sexism is not the same thing as homophobia…by the way
“So… if you can elbow a strait person in the face for being in a gay bar, can I elbow you in the face if you go to a strait bar? Oh… wait, wait wait… that’s right, there is no such thing as a strait bar… that would be sexist. This is called the world. You share it with many different people who have as much right to be here as you do. IJS…”
WTF, man? Straight people don’t need their own bars to feel safe and protected and among their own! All non-gay bars are straight bars just like 10 months of the year are White Man’s History Month. Stop trying to act like a victim, you fucking loser. Anyway, she didn’t want to elbow a bitch in the face for just /being/ in a gay bar. She wanted to elbow the bitch because she looked at her with disdain and loathing when she hit on her, as if she wasn’t expecting a gay bar to be filled with lesbians. The bitch should’ve been flattered!
Anyway, don’t take your anger out on the actress. She didn’t write the rant.
Amen! It seems to be more and more every time I go out now. I was in Chicago, AT THE CHICAGO GAY PRIDE FEST, And my friends and I (girls), Kept getting hit on by guys. Getting our asses grabbed, And I once, had my chest grabbed. We got so pissed one night at a guy who wouldn’t leave us alone, with the remarks to us, we left the GAY bar we were in; For being harassed by a straight man. I am GAY. I AM IN A GAY BAR. This is happening more and more, It is awful! I loved this video. ;) And, Bob, 1. The word “Straight” is spelled just that. Not “Strait” unless your sexuality is depending on a channel of water to determine what you feel. Gay bars are labeled gay, for us homosexuals to go to, to do our thing without the nasty looks we receive elsewhere. Bisexuals would be open to gay people. And not snarl at us. Jennymarie Jemison- I loved your argument and I think my pal did too, because she just so happens to be the one who sent it to me! <3
Really? Have some of you misinterpreted this THAT badly? Like she said, she understands wanting to go out and have a good time, but don’t act like you’re in a straight bar when you’re not. No, gentlemen, don’t bother the ladies there (would you like it, or even understand, if a guy at a straight grabbed your ass?). In fact, why are you grabbing anyone’s ass? Unless you have permission, that’s just rude, no matter the vicinity. No, ladies, if a woman hits on you, you shouldn’t be offended, just say you’re not interested (like you do when you’re not interested in men). She’s a girl, not a one eyed purple monster.
And to the person who asked about bisexuals, I’m fairly certain they would know who to pick up and who would pick them up at a gay bar. Liking both sexes doesn’t render you devoid of common sense.
As a straight man, I am angry at all the animosity from the gay crowd. I happen to have some very good friends who are gay, and I have a few times in the past accompanied them to bars deemed as gay bars. Maybe I just want to hang out with my friends? Just because a straight guy is in a gay bar dosen’t mean that he will be hitting on girls. I know I certainly havent. And for a group of people who want acceptance, you should feel good that straight people don’t want to completely disassociate from homosexuals and feel comfortable enough to be around people who may have a different viewpoint.
Wow, people are really getting mean. I can see how it would be hard to deal with straight people going to gay bars for the wrong reasons (ie harrassing women etc) but as a straight women, my husband and I go to gay clubs every once and a while to meet up with some of our gay friends. I always felt like we were being supportive to go somewhere they felt comfortable but now I dont know. I really feel like we should all be a little more kind, huh?
The point of the rant is not that straight people shouldn’t go to gay bars, but that straight people shouldn’t be offended if they get hit on by gay people, or hit on the opposite sex when they’re most likely gay.
When I go to straight bars, I don’t get offended if girls hit on me (it happens), and I wouldn’t walk up to the first straight guy I see and hit on him…
Those that are accusing gays of discriminating against straight people need to re watch this rant and understand that we have nothing against straight people being in gay bars. We do however, have a problem with straight people discriminating against gays in our very own bar or outright disrepecting us by either hitting on us or being offended if they are hit on by us. We do not go to straight bars and hit on straight people. We don’t get offended if straights hit on us in a straight bar. We do not make faces and scoff at straight people in a straight bar or anywhere for that matter. The reason why we have gay bars is because we are not accepted in your bars. We want to have a good time like everyone else w/o being disrespected, harassed and threatened. If you want to party with us then lets party but don’t invade the few places we have to truely be ourselves to hate or disrespect us. We get that enough everywhere else in society.
Hey, for all of you who are offended by this, I can understand how you may interpret this as hate against straight people, but really it’s about how some straight people act inappropriately in “gay bars”, places created so that gay people can feel safe and have fun without fear of hate from straight people, and meet other gay people (which explains the argument a poster put of a “straight bar” because straight people don’t need to feel safe from gay people, and “straight bars” are not really needed to meet other straight people). Like the ranter said, it’s okay if straight people want to have a good time at a gay bar and hang with friends, but there are just SOME (remember, I say “some”) straight people who go to gay bars and yet expect to be treated as straight. For example, it’s okay to be a straight guy and hang at a gay bar, but it only becomes inappropriate if a straight guy begins to actively hitting on girls knowing that he’s in a gay bar. Likewise if you’re a straight woman who wants to hang out at a gay club, that’s cool, but a straight woman should expect that there will be people there who will assume she’s gay and therefore may be hit on by other women, so she shouldn’t be offended if that does happen. The rant is simply a message of frustration detailing some of her bad experiences with a few straight people when she went to a gay bar to have fun.
Love it (althogh the video and audio didn’t synch for me). This is so true. Why is it always me who hits on the straight girls? And is it just me who is annoyed by the straight couple making out in the gay bar? We can’t make out in their bars generally, at least not safely, so I think they should be more respectful. Straight men who hit on women they know are lesbians are pigs, period, and they’re the one that deserve the elbow (or maybe the knee…)
“the following is based on a real post made by a real person…” anyone with “common sense” understands perfectly that the blond girl is an actress. And come on!!! it’s a funny situation, don’t take it personal ^^
I could care less if straight people hang out at a gay bar. My only complaint would be when creepy guys try to dance behind all the girls. There are plenty of straight girls in the world, why do they have to come to a gay bar to dance behind girls who are having a great time together. I also don’t like it when they follow my lesbian friends around thinking that they can “change” them or when they try to grab me in inappropriate places. Seriously, those creepers should never let inside a gay club.
I have nothing to contribute that hasn’t already been said, and apart from being down with all thats put across in the vid the actor is seriously wickedly hot. I’d hit on her in a heartbeat… Yes I know I’m shallow!
I showed this to a (straight) female friend of mine, and she immediately defended herself by saying “because I want to hang out with my gay friends.”
There is absolutely nothing wrong with that.
But the emotional frustration rises from the assumption of the default – that is – the default “straightness” in our world at large. Unless a lesbian fulfills the stereotype of a butch dyke, or carries some emblematic lesbian button, she is assumed straight until proven otherwise.
This could be frustrating when she goes to a straight bar with straight friends, since most likely, she is there for platonic play. If she wants to befriend a guy there, she has to establish that she is not romantically interested, that it will never happen. If she wants to befriend a girl there, she has to either establish, right off the bat, that she is gay and is not interested in a straight girl (and is thus just there to meet people talking about work, weather and Michael Jackson), or attempt to ascertain the often no than yes reality of whether the girl of interest is gay.
It’s a bar. People are there to 1. get drunk 2. hook up 3. both. It’s the one place where these motives are not taboo.
So it’s not necessary the point that gay bars are not as accepting as straight bars toward the “other,” rather, it’s that the straight bar is the default bar – and the gay bar is the marginal bar. Marginality is an identity that requires reemphasis and reassurance. The gay bar creates a temporary bubble where queerness (and this includes bi people) is the default, so that gay people can cast away the frustration of going through the process of reinforcing his or her sexuality in a world blanketed by the heterosexual norm.
Come on you alleged straights stop with the stupid. You know your in a gay bar – WHY?? If your there to support friends you are NOT making faces and insulting gays. If you are grabbing asses you are an ass with inappropriate behavior no matter the place and you know it.
If you are straight and in a gay bar behaving somewhat like an adult human, NO ONE Cares, let me repeat that No one cares, because we can’t tell your straight; until you start acting out assholes.
So pleas stop with the phony outrage. You have access to 99.9 percent of all the bars in the US so whats in a gay bar that you could possibly care about.
Your there to feel superior, pretend to be offended, or harass because guess what Skippy your not gonna score, get over it!!
Oh look at all the straight people here not getting the point… Gay bars exist because we are a minority with not too many chances to hook up. It really spoils the mood for us when straight people try to hit on us because that’s not the reason why we go to gay places!
So why do you?
What if you, straight person, went to a straight bar (ok, they don’t call them that because they don’t have to as straight is the norm… Bob, that comment was for you) and all the action you had all night was members of the same sex trying to hit on you. You wouldn’t be too pleased, would you?
What’s the point in going to a gay bar in the hopes of finding a mate if all the people there are straight? You have 90% of the bars in the world to yourselves, why don’t you go there? Of course we wouldn’t mind you being in gay places if you RESPECTED THAT, if you went there to just have fun, but too many of you are there looking for hookups or to laugh at gays!
This has actually happened to me. And it was even WEIRDER than the above Rant.
I ran into a former co-worker at the local gay bar, and just walked up to her to say “Hi.” She gave me an ugly look like I was a sleazeball rudely hitting on her, and then was so embarrassed when I reminded her who I was, all she could stammer was, “I don’t work there anymore.”
“Yeah, I know. I just wanted to say Hi. Have a nice night,” and walked away.
Straights should wear “Straight but not Narrow” buttons or something when they go to a Gay bar. Alleviate the confusion immediately, and in a humorous way.
Well Let me see I agree with the people that say yeah is it ok for me to elbow you in the face if you can so can I. However if the Bar is Identified as Gay with such things like This is a Gay bar enter at own risk Straight people ….No wait that is no good either cuase the GAY People would not like that would they, It would be the same as saying this is a striaght bar entire at own risk gay people how far would that fly not very far would it. I have wlaked into GAY bars and they looked just like any other bar I walked into up to the point of oh yeah there ae guys over there holding hands and girls over there tonsel tickling each other. I say lable the Damn thing Gays only Striaghts only oh yes and Blacks Only and Yellows only and reds only lets give evrybody there own damn bar and the world would be a better place right. Well no it would not be would it they tried that already and did not get too far.
Since homosexual people are a minority, there are clubs especially for them. Ofcourse straight people are welcome there, but if you are there to make fun at homosexuals or to pinch lesbian asses, fuck off then.
I think the point she was getting at was, If your in a gay bar and get offended when a gay person hits on you, you deserve a kick in the cunt..
Just my opinion..allm straight guy friends come clubbing with me..they have a great time..they love when guys buy them drinks and if guy trys to score them they run off :D
I think this is a pretty unfortunately titled video, and by calling it what she has and saying the next straight girl she hits on she’s going to elbow in the face she runs the risk of causing offence even if the majority of her points are valid. I totally agree that you shouldn’t got to a gay bar to intend to:
- Pick up a guy
- Make faces at gay people dancing together
- Scoff at someone if she hits on you.
I think that straight men grabbing girls asses, or in fact anyone grabbing someone elses ass completely uninvited is a universally annoying thing and to be honest half the reason that straight girls like going to gay bars anyway. It’s a lack of respect and irritates people wherever it happens…
BUT
To say that she’s going to elbow in the face the next straight girl she hits on is bound to offend a few people. I think if you want to go to a gay bar, you do so knowing where you are, respecting where you are and the people who are there, but if you choose to go and are prepared to be respectful to the people and the environment I think that you should be shown the same respect in return. If you have gay friends or just enjoy the environment and show respect why shouldn’t you be allowed in a gay bar? I don’t actually think this is her point, but by naming the video what the f*ck are you doing in a gay bar if you’re not gay you can’t blame people for thinking that this is exactly what she’s trying to say.
Oh and personally if people hit on me in a respectful way regardless of how many times it happened, who they were and in what club I was in, I wouldn’t mind at all if they respected me if I politely turned them down, in fact I’d probably be pretty flattered (this is in response to Wormsies comments that we wouldn’t be very pleased if it happened in reverse) – I don’t think it’s the hitting on thing that’s the issue, I think it’s how it’s done. If anyone just grabbed my ass regardless of who they were or where I was it would piss me off…one of the reasons I actually quite like going to gay bars as I find it happens with significantly less frequency.
I say live and let live, if you respect the people around you then no-one should have a problem with you.
There is no straight bar. Gays go wherever they want, and to top it off ALSO have their own bars. I’ve yet to be in one of these ‘straight bars’ that bans gays from its doors. This post is another example of the reason people don’t take homos seriously.
I would assume the poster has no problem if a bunch of women grab her ass.
Why don’t you gays learn to work with society instead of demanding special treatment and then you can deal with the same problems the rest of the world deals with. I mean, shit, you have your own fucking bar. Now you need to bitch and moan over a few people in there? Pathetic rant.
Sooo, i´m allowed to take a drink with a gay friend in a gay bar or we must go to a “straight” bar?
i´m not going here to make fun of the gays, neither to try to “turn” some lesbian. I just want to take a beer with a gay friend who was countless times with me in “straight” (sorry, i never think that a bar could be “straight”, feels like nazi or something like that) bars.
Maybe it´s because i´m from Spain. Here we tend to be less morons. Apparently.
I voted no on prop 8…this kind of bs makes me wish I would have voted yes. You want to discriminate against me? There are way more people like me than there are people like you. Stop hurting the cause of freedom and shut your dumbass mouth.
at a minimum. there are others. leave it to some threatened, homophobic (white, i’m betting) men to make everything about THEM and how wah wah oppressed they are by gay people not wanting to be harassed by assholes. Cal, i sincerely don’t believe you voted against prop 8, since you obviously have issues with gay people.
sam: it is proof that you consider gay people inferior to you, by calling equal rights ‘special’ rights. to be treated as worthy or respect and personal space is too good for them, right? that’s reserved for the oh-so-special oppressed white men. cry me a river, build a bridge, and get over it. no one cares about your pitiful, immature, prejudiced bullshit.
Wooah people calm down. You know what this site is called? ProjectRANT, you know RANT, as in vent your frustrations in an angry manner.
If I have a rant about something I know that I’m not necessarily being fair to everyone involved, but who gives a sh*t? It’s a rant, it’s designed to make me feel better, not give a balanced social commentary.
Most gay people I know (myself included) don’t mind straight people in bars, I don’t have that many gay friends, so if I go out it’s nice to be able to go with my friends.
Like the original ranter, however, I get annoyed with straight guys leering at girls kissing, or straight girls who look at you like you’re some alien freak or disgusting lech or both, just because you ask if you can buy them a drink. You expect that in other ‘straight’ bars*, but in a place that’s been designed so gay people have somewhere to go and dance and meet people in a safe and comfortable way, we shouldn’t be made to feel like freaks.
So to anyone thinking ‘wow, gay people can get really nasty and are just as bad at excluding people’ Actually, I think what you’ll find is gay people get really angry and frustrated at all the shit they take during their life, so yeah, sometimes we need a good rant.
*(even though why the hell should you? Couldn’t people just politely say no thanks like they would if it was a guy they didn’t find attractive?)
This lesbian is crazy, lol. I’m gay and I’ve been clubbing for twenty years, every week of that twenty years. It is a fact that the clear majority of Gay men’s best friends are straight women and it is these best friends that are going to go to gay bars with their best Gay friends. That is a fact that no ranting lesbian will ever change. Having said that she does make a legitimate point of the creepy straight men who go to gay bars to pick up on straight women because they can’t deal with the competition at the straight bars. Any straight dude that just feels he’s privileged enough to just grab a women’s ass at a club is a problem whether the club is straight or gay. I don’t like it when gay men feel privileged to grab my ass or crotch. It’s like what the f*** this isn’t a bath house.
I’ve never had a problem with straight people clubbing in my scene and I’ve never seen straight people stare at gay people in a gay bar with a look of disgust or mockery. That would take some real balls considering your surroundings because if you did you’d probably at that point either be asked to leave or get your asses kicked one or the other.
I’ve even threatened a gay bar with a law suite for asking a straight couple to leave because they were making out. That was outrageous for them to ask them to leave because they were making out. Here we are in a day and age where we’re struggling for acceptance into mainstream society and we’re going to do to hetero sexuals what their majority has done to us, hell no. Not to mention that these two straight people were obviously friends of the gay community. Wow! what a way to treat true friends. Dumb asses.
I get part of where she’s coming from. The only thing more annoying for gays than going to a straight bar and having people tell me to stop dancing with another girl is going to a gay bar and having people tell me to stop dancing with another girl. For the love of God, if it makes you that uncomfortable, go somewhere else!
As long as that doesn’t happen, the more the merrier.
And Cal, seriously? Because you heard something you didn’t like from one girl on the Internet, you want to ban us all from the right to marry? Real decent.
Its not about straight people going to gay bars to have a good time. I bring some of my straight girl friends there because they want to have a good time and NOT GET HIT ON BY A GUY. Its about straight people going to a gay bar to pick up other straight people. And as for those looks you give us, YOU’RE in OUR bar. Deal with it.
I had an awquard conversation about something like this and came off as sounding very un-pc. I think that people should be able to go where they choose. Straight people should be just as welcome in a gay bar as we should be in a regular bar. It’s progression when we can go to these places to get away from the outside world and be ‘ourselves’ with each other and infront of hetrosexuals who choose visit and act respectably. no one should turn anyone away from an establishment because of sexuality. I’ll be honest though…sometimes i just want a gay bar to be a gay bar. I think that it’s perhaps because I live in a very small city with only 2 gay bars, I’ll go down my local one night and realise that atleast most of the people are straight students and hen parties. some nights you just want to go to a gay bar for what it is, there are 2 places for me to go. that sounds kinda nasty and i feel bad about saying it. it’s really not about who belongs and who doesnt however. is the term ‘gay bar’ really relevant anymore? does it matter either way? is it only a matter of time before having our ‘own world/culture/community’ will be detrimental to total equality and acceptance? how will we meet each other in the future (as it’s difficult in everyday life)? I maybe will benefity from visiting a bigger city more often however! this topic is a bit of a mindfield, when one of the straight posters above said she just wanted to be with her gay friends, that brought it home. we have structured our own communities so we can fulfill our lives, but the future of the gay community HAS to be totally inclusive of straight people, this means bars too. mutual respect. i’ll probably be told i’m talking out of my arse now but i hope that makes sense!
I can’t believe how many people get offended by this rant. Are you honestly going to say that people don’t have straight clubs when the clubs that aren’t gay are basically for straight people? If you walk into a regular club,as a woman,and try to find another woman,you’ll probably get grinded upon by a variety of men trying to pressure you into mud wrestling with some straight chick in a fucking bikini.And you still aren’t going to get laid. The reason there are gay bars is because it’s hard to find people in regular bars WHO ARE GAY.Therefore,when straight people come into a gay bar and make it twice as confusing to meet someone,PEOPLE GET UPSET.Just shut up.
Hohohoooooly crap. Wait, an internet thread about gay/straight drama that blows up? Inconceivable! I’m sure all this shit has been covered already… but what the fuck — I’m too lazy and just arrogant enough to reiterate a few points.
1. When you walk into a gay bar/club, assume you might get hit on by a member of the same sex. If you can’t deal with that possibility, DON’T FUCKING GO. And if you DO get hit on, why the fuck would you take it as anything other than a compliment? Christ, my gay girlfriends drag me — a straight guy — to gay bars all the time as a wingman. I get hit on, and it’s as simple as saying “Sorry, I’m not gay — just here with some friends.” Insert reassuring compliments as desired.
2. Straight girls go to gay bars to get away from the stereotypical straight club/bar guys, who are too insecure with their own sexuality to set foot inside. Sadly, many of said straight girls are ALSO just as insecure, leading to aforementioned scoffing in the rant. Again, if you can’t deal with getting hit on at a club, DONT. FUCKING. GO.
3. Herren has it right — straight people walking into a gay bar just make it confusing for the people that are there to hook up with members of the same sex; ESPECIALLY when they’re too drunk to realize they’re being hit on.
4. Kind of a side topic, but I’ll state it again. ANYONE grabbing ANYONE’S ass when not privy to it deserves a swift elbow to the fucking face.
I’m standing in a line at G Bar in New York with 40 other gay men waiting to get in. Drunk straight chick (with her shamed gay friend in tow) marches from the back of the line, saying: “I don’t have to wait in this line, I’m STRAIGHT!” The bouncer sent her right back to the end of the line, which erupted in CHEERS!
Moral of the story: drunk straight chicks really DO believe they are in a socially and morally superior position and that they should be given unearned privilege wherever they go. Their patronizing, tired, outdated sneering at gay men is such a downer that I just don’t want to be around it.
And, in addition, Sex and the City (both movies) sucked. The bad girls love it only because they think it validates their lack of understanding of the basics of social behavior, respect for others, and common decency.
I’m a straight man and I go to gay bars all the time. I have members of my family that are homosexual and the girl I am seeing currently has a homosexual best friend so we go to a gay club in the city all the time. I go because I wanna spend time with my friends in a setting that doesn’t bother me too much. I’ve been to straight clubs and I have to say they aren’t nearly as fun. I have the utmost respect for the gay community and I for one will be the first
to defend any homsexual enduring prejudice or descrimination. I don’t see the big deal if a straight man goes to have a good time? I’ve had some of the best conversations of my life with homosexuals.
Why cant i go to a gay bar if i’m not gay.. I not gonna scold you or get offended if a woman someone hits on me.. I just want to check one out, kinda getting tired out creepy guys trying to hit on me.Plus I dont go to bars to meet men, just to have a good time and drink. lol.
So… if you can elbow a strait person in the face for being in a gay bar, can I elbow you in the face if you go to a strait bar? Oh… wait, wait wait… that’s right, there is no such thing as a strait bar… that would be sexist. This is called the world. You share it with many different people who have as much right to be here as you do. IJS…
It’s great! I really like your webpage. Those are actually topics people are only talking about at home…privately. It’s a good way to think about those topics and our everyday life in society. Keep on!
P.S. Great video quality and awesome actors – makes the webisode even better!
so is this dumb blond denying the existence of bisexual people?
What bar is this? Come on you sure you don’t want me to grab your ass? Just a little pinch maybe ;].
OMG! This is me! This totally fucking happens! WTF straight people? Get yer shizzle together and grow up!
So you hate it when you get discriminated against for being gay and hate it when straight people don’t want yo uin their bars yet you feel its OK to discriminate against straight people in gay bars? Sounds hypocritical to me. People like you make it hard for straight people to accept the notion that gays want equal rights. No wonder they accuse gays of wanting special rights, not equal rights.
hahaha
I love this, it happens ALL THE TIME. my life.
“i want a girl to do it!” hah!
awesome…
I’m so glad that this rant is on here.
If I see another straight guy trying to “change” the chicks at a gay bar-I’ll freak.
Bob-All bars ARE straight bars,except for the few little bars that gays can go.Plus why would we go to a straight bar?THAT’S THE POINT OF HAVING A GAY BAR!
ok first its straight, not strait like the body of water. and second consider the fact that about 80-90 percent of the united states identify themselves as heterosexual, then consider the assumption that when you see someone they are automatically considered straight. there are straight bars, every bar or club is a ‘straight’ bar… unless it is classified as a gay bar. so maybe having a place where people of a minority can meet other people in that minority is a helpful thing. oh and sexism is not the same thing as homophobia…by the way
“So… if you can elbow a strait person in the face for being in a gay bar, can I elbow you in the face if you go to a strait bar? Oh… wait, wait wait… that’s right, there is no such thing as a strait bar… that would be sexist. This is called the world. You share it with many different people who have as much right to be here as you do. IJS…”
WTF, man? Straight people don’t need their own bars to feel safe and protected and among their own! All non-gay bars are straight bars just like 10 months of the year are White Man’s History Month. Stop trying to act like a victim, you fucking loser. Anyway, she didn’t want to elbow a bitch in the face for just /being/ in a gay bar. She wanted to elbow the bitch because she looked at her with disdain and loathing when she hit on her, as if she wasn’t expecting a gay bar to be filled with lesbians. The bitch should’ve been flattered!
Anyway, don’t take your anger out on the actress. She didn’t write the rant.
Amen! It seems to be more and more every time I go out now. I was in Chicago, AT THE CHICAGO GAY PRIDE FEST, And my friends and I (girls), Kept getting hit on by guys. Getting our asses grabbed, And I once, had my chest grabbed. We got so pissed one night at a guy who wouldn’t leave us alone, with the remarks to us, we left the GAY bar we were in; For being harassed by a straight man. I am GAY. I AM IN A GAY BAR. This is happening more and more, It is awful! I loved this video. ;) And, Bob, 1. The word “Straight” is spelled just that. Not “Strait” unless your sexuality is depending on a channel of water to determine what you feel. Gay bars are labeled gay, for us homosexuals to go to, to do our thing without the nasty looks we receive elsewhere. Bisexuals would be open to gay people. And not snarl at us. Jennymarie Jemison- I loved your argument and I think my pal did too, because she just so happens to be the one who sent it to me! <3
love it, definitely.
Really? Have some of you misinterpreted this THAT badly? Like she said, she understands wanting to go out and have a good time, but don’t act like you’re in a straight bar when you’re not. No, gentlemen, don’t bother the ladies there (would you like it, or even understand, if a guy at a straight grabbed your ass?). In fact, why are you grabbing anyone’s ass? Unless you have permission, that’s just rude, no matter the vicinity. No, ladies, if a woman hits on you, you shouldn’t be offended, just say you’re not interested (like you do when you’re not interested in men). She’s a girl, not a one eyed purple monster.
And to the person who asked about bisexuals, I’m fairly certain they would know who to pick up and who would pick them up at a gay bar. Liking both sexes doesn’t render you devoid of common sense.
As a straight man, I am angry at all the animosity from the gay crowd. I happen to have some very good friends who are gay, and I have a few times in the past accompanied them to bars deemed as gay bars. Maybe I just want to hang out with my friends? Just because a straight guy is in a gay bar dosen’t mean that he will be hitting on girls. I know I certainly havent. And for a group of people who want acceptance, you should feel good that straight people don’t want to completely disassociate from homosexuals and feel comfortable enough to be around people who may have a different viewpoint.
Wow, people are really getting mean. I can see how it would be hard to deal with straight people going to gay bars for the wrong reasons (ie harrassing women etc) but as a straight women, my husband and I go to gay clubs every once and a while to meet up with some of our gay friends. I always felt like we were being supportive to go somewhere they felt comfortable but now I dont know. I really feel like we should all be a little more kind, huh?
The point of the rant is not that straight people shouldn’t go to gay bars, but that straight people shouldn’t be offended if they get hit on by gay people, or hit on the opposite sex when they’re most likely gay.
When I go to straight bars, I don’t get offended if girls hit on me (it happens), and I wouldn’t walk up to the first straight guy I see and hit on him…
Those that are accusing gays of discriminating against straight people need to re watch this rant and understand that we have nothing against straight people being in gay bars. We do however, have a problem with straight people discriminating against gays in our very own bar or outright disrepecting us by either hitting on us or being offended if they are hit on by us. We do not go to straight bars and hit on straight people. We don’t get offended if straights hit on us in a straight bar. We do not make faces and scoff at straight people in a straight bar or anywhere for that matter. The reason why we have gay bars is because we are not accepted in your bars. We want to have a good time like everyone else w/o being disrespected, harassed and threatened. If you want to party with us then lets party but don’t invade the few places we have to truely be ourselves to hate or disrespect us. We get that enough everywhere else in society.
Hey, for all of you who are offended by this, I can understand how you may interpret this as hate against straight people, but really it’s about how some straight people act inappropriately in “gay bars”, places created so that gay people can feel safe and have fun without fear of hate from straight people, and meet other gay people (which explains the argument a poster put of a “straight bar” because straight people don’t need to feel safe from gay people, and “straight bars” are not really needed to meet other straight people). Like the ranter said, it’s okay if straight people want to have a good time at a gay bar and hang with friends, but there are just SOME (remember, I say “some”) straight people who go to gay bars and yet expect to be treated as straight. For example, it’s okay to be a straight guy and hang at a gay bar, but it only becomes inappropriate if a straight guy begins to actively hitting on girls knowing that he’s in a gay bar. Likewise if you’re a straight woman who wants to hang out at a gay club, that’s cool, but a straight woman should expect that there will be people there who will assume she’s gay and therefore may be hit on by other women, so she shouldn’t be offended if that does happen. The rant is simply a message of frustration detailing some of her bad experiences with a few straight people when she went to a gay bar to have fun.
Love it! Very funny and very true – some straight people do apparently have a huge problem with grasping the concept of a “gay bar” being gay…
Love it (althogh the video and audio didn’t synch for me). This is so true. Why is it always me who hits on the straight girls? And is it just me who is annoyed by the straight couple making out in the gay bar? We can’t make out in their bars generally, at least not safely, so I think they should be more respectful. Straight men who hit on women they know are lesbians are pigs, period, and they’re the one that deserve the elbow (or maybe the knee…)
“the following is based on a real post made by a real person…” anyone with “common sense” understands perfectly that the blond girl is an actress. And come on!!! it’s a funny situation, don’t take it personal ^^
I could care less if straight people hang out at a gay bar. My only complaint would be when creepy guys try to dance behind all the girls. There are plenty of straight girls in the world, why do they have to come to a gay bar to dance behind girls who are having a great time together. I also don’t like it when they follow my lesbian friends around thinking that they can “change” them or when they try to grab me in inappropriate places. Seriously, those creepers should never let inside a gay club.
Amen.
I have nothing to contribute that hasn’t already been said, and apart from being down with all thats put across in the vid the actor is seriously wickedly hot. I’d hit on her in a heartbeat… Yes I know I’m shallow!
I showed this to a (straight) female friend of mine, and she immediately defended herself by saying “because I want to hang out with my gay friends.”
There is absolutely nothing wrong with that.
But the emotional frustration rises from the assumption of the default – that is – the default “straightness” in our world at large. Unless a lesbian fulfills the stereotype of a butch dyke, or carries some emblematic lesbian button, she is assumed straight until proven otherwise.
This could be frustrating when she goes to a straight bar with straight friends, since most likely, she is there for platonic play. If she wants to befriend a guy there, she has to establish that she is not romantically interested, that it will never happen. If she wants to befriend a girl there, she has to either establish, right off the bat, that she is gay and is not interested in a straight girl (and is thus just there to meet people talking about work, weather and Michael Jackson), or attempt to ascertain the often no than yes reality of whether the girl of interest is gay.
It’s a bar. People are there to 1. get drunk 2. hook up 3. both. It’s the one place where these motives are not taboo.
So it’s not necessary the point that gay bars are not as accepting as straight bars toward the “other,” rather, it’s that the straight bar is the default bar – and the gay bar is the marginal bar. Marginality is an identity that requires reemphasis and reassurance. The gay bar creates a temporary bubble where queerness (and this includes bi people) is the default, so that gay people can cast away the frustration of going through the process of reinforcing his or her sexuality in a world blanketed by the heterosexual norm.
Come on you alleged straights stop with the stupid. You know your in a gay bar – WHY?? If your there to support friends you are NOT making faces and insulting gays. If you are grabbing asses you are an ass with inappropriate behavior no matter the place and you know it.
If you are straight and in a gay bar behaving somewhat like an adult human, NO ONE Cares, let me repeat that No one cares, because we can’t tell your straight; until you start acting out assholes.
So pleas stop with the phony outrage. You have access to 99.9 percent of all the bars in the US so whats in a gay bar that you could possibly care about.
Your there to feel superior, pretend to be offended, or harass because guess what Skippy your not gonna score, get over it!!
This was hysterical! I completely agree with this girl! Shit makes no sense.
Oh look at all the straight people here not getting the point… Gay bars exist because we are a minority with not too many chances to hook up. It really spoils the mood for us when straight people try to hit on us because that’s not the reason why we go to gay places!
So why do you?
What if you, straight person, went to a straight bar (ok, they don’t call them that because they don’t have to as straight is the norm… Bob, that comment was for you) and all the action you had all night was members of the same sex trying to hit on you. You wouldn’t be too pleased, would you?
What’s the point in going to a gay bar in the hopes of finding a mate if all the people there are straight? You have 90% of the bars in the world to yourselves, why don’t you go there? Of course we wouldn’t mind you being in gay places if you RESPECTED THAT, if you went there to just have fun, but too many of you are there looking for hookups or to laugh at gays!
genius
rofl…that was hilarious
Some people are just not getting this.
This has actually happened to me. And it was even WEIRDER than the above Rant.
I ran into a former co-worker at the local gay bar, and just walked up to her to say “Hi.” She gave me an ugly look like I was a sleazeball rudely hitting on her, and then was so embarrassed when I reminded her who I was, all she could stammer was, “I don’t work there anymore.”
“Yeah, I know. I just wanted to say Hi. Have a nice night,” and walked away.
Straights should wear “Straight but not Narrow” buttons or something when they go to a Gay bar. Alleviate the confusion immediately, and in a humorous way.
She’s hot! I would grab her ass for sure, see if she elbows me :p
Well Let me see I agree with the people that say yeah is it ok for me to elbow you in the face if you can so can I. However if the Bar is Identified as Gay with such things like This is a Gay bar enter at own risk Straight people ….No wait that is no good either cuase the GAY People would not like that would they, It would be the same as saying this is a striaght bar entire at own risk gay people how far would that fly not very far would it. I have wlaked into GAY bars and they looked just like any other bar I walked into up to the point of oh yeah there ae guys over there holding hands and girls over there tonsel tickling each other. I say lable the Damn thing Gays only Striaghts only oh yes and Blacks Only and Yellows only and reds only lets give evrybody there own damn bar and the world would be a better place right. Well no it would not be would it they tried that already and did not get too far.
Since homosexual people are a minority, there are clubs especially for them. Ofcourse straight people are welcome there, but if you are there to make fun at homosexuals or to pinch lesbian asses, fuck off then.
I think the point she was getting at was, If your in a gay bar and get offended when a gay person hits on you, you deserve a kick in the cunt..
Just my opinion..allm straight guy friends come clubbing with me..they have a great time..they love when guys buy them drinks and if guy trys to score them they run off :D
Amen!
its not that straight people are not allowed in the gay bar, its why are you surprised if a gay hit on you?
and you look at us in disgust?
I think this is a pretty unfortunately titled video, and by calling it what she has and saying the next straight girl she hits on she’s going to elbow in the face she runs the risk of causing offence even if the majority of her points are valid. I totally agree that you shouldn’t got to a gay bar to intend to:
- Pick up a guy
- Make faces at gay people dancing together
- Scoff at someone if she hits on you.
I think that straight men grabbing girls asses, or in fact anyone grabbing someone elses ass completely uninvited is a universally annoying thing and to be honest half the reason that straight girls like going to gay bars anyway. It’s a lack of respect and irritates people wherever it happens…
BUT
To say that she’s going to elbow in the face the next straight girl she hits on is bound to offend a few people. I think if you want to go to a gay bar, you do so knowing where you are, respecting where you are and the people who are there, but if you choose to go and are prepared to be respectful to the people and the environment I think that you should be shown the same respect in return. If you have gay friends or just enjoy the environment and show respect why shouldn’t you be allowed in a gay bar? I don’t actually think this is her point, but by naming the video what the f*ck are you doing in a gay bar if you’re not gay you can’t blame people for thinking that this is exactly what she’s trying to say.
Oh and personally if people hit on me in a respectful way regardless of how many times it happened, who they were and in what club I was in, I wouldn’t mind at all if they respected me if I politely turned them down, in fact I’d probably be pretty flattered (this is in response to Wormsies comments that we wouldn’t be very pleased if it happened in reverse) – I don’t think it’s the hitting on thing that’s the issue, I think it’s how it’s done. If anyone just grabbed my ass regardless of who they were or where I was it would piss me off…one of the reasons I actually quite like going to gay bars as I find it happens with significantly less frequency.
I say live and let live, if you respect the people around you then no-one should have a problem with you.
There is no straight bar. Gays go wherever they want, and to top it off ALSO have their own bars. I’ve yet to be in one of these ‘straight bars’ that bans gays from its doors. This post is another example of the reason people don’t take homos seriously.
I would assume the poster has no problem if a bunch of women grab her ass.
Why don’t you gays learn to work with society instead of demanding special treatment and then you can deal with the same problems the rest of the world deals with. I mean, shit, you have your own fucking bar. Now you need to bitch and moan over a few people in there? Pathetic rant.
I agree. Same thing with restaurants, schools, and water fountains. I’m all for segregaytion.
Sooo, i´m allowed to take a drink with a gay friend in a gay bar or we must go to a “straight” bar?
i´m not going here to make fun of the gays, neither to try to “turn” some lesbian. I just want to take a beer with a gay friend who was countless times with me in “straight” (sorry, i never think that a bar could be “straight”, feels like nazi or something like that) bars.
Maybe it´s because i´m from Spain. Here we tend to be less morons. Apparently.
I voted no on prop 8…this kind of bs makes me wish I would have voted yes. You want to discriminate against me? There are way more people like me than there are people like you. Stop hurting the cause of freedom and shut your dumbass mouth.
the comments are crackin me up! people take everything so seriously… lol lol lol
let us count the bigots:
1. BOB
2. Sam
3. Cal
at a minimum. there are others. leave it to some threatened, homophobic (white, i’m betting) men to make everything about THEM and how wah wah oppressed they are by gay people not wanting to be harassed by assholes. Cal, i sincerely don’t believe you voted against prop 8, since you obviously have issues with gay people.
sam: it is proof that you consider gay people inferior to you, by calling equal rights ‘special’ rights. to be treated as worthy or respect and personal space is too good for them, right? that’s reserved for the oh-so-special oppressed white men. cry me a river, build a bridge, and get over it. no one cares about your pitiful, immature, prejudiced bullshit.
Wooah people calm down. You know what this site is called? ProjectRANT, you know RANT, as in vent your frustrations in an angry manner.
If I have a rant about something I know that I’m not necessarily being fair to everyone involved, but who gives a sh*t? It’s a rant, it’s designed to make me feel better, not give a balanced social commentary.
Most gay people I know (myself included) don’t mind straight people in bars, I don’t have that many gay friends, so if I go out it’s nice to be able to go with my friends.
Like the original ranter, however, I get annoyed with straight guys leering at girls kissing, or straight girls who look at you like you’re some alien freak or disgusting lech or both, just because you ask if you can buy them a drink. You expect that in other ‘straight’ bars*, but in a place that’s been designed so gay people have somewhere to go and dance and meet people in a safe and comfortable way, we shouldn’t be made to feel like freaks.
So to anyone thinking ‘wow, gay people can get really nasty and are just as bad at excluding people’ Actually, I think what you’ll find is gay people get really angry and frustrated at all the shit they take during their life, so yeah, sometimes we need a good rant.
*(even though why the hell should you? Couldn’t people just politely say no thanks like they would if it was a guy they didn’t find attractive?)
I would like to apologize on behalf of all the stupid gay people >< I promise we’re not all that bad.
Suffice to say, vist any type of fucking bar you want to go to whenever you feel like you want to go. That is all.
This lesbian is crazy, lol. I’m gay and I’ve been clubbing for twenty years, every week of that twenty years. It is a fact that the clear majority of Gay men’s best friends are straight women and it is these best friends that are going to go to gay bars with their best Gay friends. That is a fact that no ranting lesbian will ever change. Having said that she does make a legitimate point of the creepy straight men who go to gay bars to pick up on straight women because they can’t deal with the competition at the straight bars. Any straight dude that just feels he’s privileged enough to just grab a women’s ass at a club is a problem whether the club is straight or gay. I don’t like it when gay men feel privileged to grab my ass or crotch. It’s like what the f*** this isn’t a bath house.
I’ve never had a problem with straight people clubbing in my scene and I’ve never seen straight people stare at gay people in a gay bar with a look of disgust or mockery. That would take some real balls considering your surroundings because if you did you’d probably at that point either be asked to leave or get your asses kicked one or the other.
I’ve even threatened a gay bar with a law suite for asking a straight couple to leave because they were making out. That was outrageous for them to ask them to leave because they were making out. Here we are in a day and age where we’re struggling for acceptance into mainstream society and we’re going to do to hetero sexuals what their majority has done to us, hell no. Not to mention that these two straight people were obviously friends of the gay community. Wow! what a way to treat true friends. Dumb asses.
I get part of where she’s coming from. The only thing more annoying for gays than going to a straight bar and having people tell me to stop dancing with another girl is going to a gay bar and having people tell me to stop dancing with another girl. For the love of God, if it makes you that uncomfortable, go somewhere else!
As long as that doesn’t happen, the more the merrier.
And Cal, seriously? Because you heard something you didn’t like from one girl on the Internet, you want to ban us all from the right to marry? Real decent.
XD, look at all the f**-bar-hopping closet-cases whining on the comedy site.
you sound pretty close minded!
Its not about straight people going to gay bars to have a good time. I bring some of my straight girl friends there because they want to have a good time and NOT GET HIT ON BY A GUY. Its about straight people going to a gay bar to pick up other straight people. And as for those looks you give us, YOU’RE in OUR bar. Deal with it.
I had an awquard conversation about something like this and came off as sounding very un-pc. I think that people should be able to go where they choose. Straight people should be just as welcome in a gay bar as we should be in a regular bar. It’s progression when we can go to these places to get away from the outside world and be ‘ourselves’ with each other and infront of hetrosexuals who choose visit and act respectably. no one should turn anyone away from an establishment because of sexuality. I’ll be honest though…sometimes i just want a gay bar to be a gay bar. I think that it’s perhaps because I live in a very small city with only 2 gay bars, I’ll go down my local one night and realise that atleast most of the people are straight students and hen parties. some nights you just want to go to a gay bar for what it is, there are 2 places for me to go. that sounds kinda nasty and i feel bad about saying it. it’s really not about who belongs and who doesnt however. is the term ‘gay bar’ really relevant anymore? does it matter either way? is it only a matter of time before having our ‘own world/culture/community’ will be detrimental to total equality and acceptance? how will we meet each other in the future (as it’s difficult in everyday life)? I maybe will benefity from visiting a bigger city more often however! this topic is a bit of a mindfield, when one of the straight posters above said she just wanted to be with her gay friends, that brought it home. we have structured our own communities so we can fulfill our lives, but the future of the gay community HAS to be totally inclusive of straight people, this means bars too. mutual respect. i’ll probably be told i’m talking out of my arse now but i hope that makes sense!
I can’t believe how many people get offended by this rant. Are you honestly going to say that people don’t have straight clubs when the clubs that aren’t gay are basically for straight people? If you walk into a regular club,as a woman,and try to find another woman,you’ll probably get grinded upon by a variety of men trying to pressure you into mud wrestling with some straight chick in a fucking bikini.And you still aren’t going to get laid. The reason there are gay bars is because it’s hard to find people in regular bars WHO ARE GAY.Therefore,when straight people come into a gay bar and make it twice as confusing to meet someone,PEOPLE GET UPSET.Just shut up.
Hohohoooooly crap. Wait, an internet thread about gay/straight drama that blows up? Inconceivable! I’m sure all this shit has been covered already… but what the fuck — I’m too lazy and just arrogant enough to reiterate a few points.
1. When you walk into a gay bar/club, assume you might get hit on by a member of the same sex. If you can’t deal with that possibility, DON’T FUCKING GO. And if you DO get hit on, why the fuck would you take it as anything other than a compliment? Christ, my gay girlfriends drag me — a straight guy — to gay bars all the time as a wingman. I get hit on, and it’s as simple as saying “Sorry, I’m not gay — just here with some friends.” Insert reassuring compliments as desired.
2. Straight girls go to gay bars to get away from the stereotypical straight club/bar guys, who are too insecure with their own sexuality to set foot inside. Sadly, many of said straight girls are ALSO just as insecure, leading to aforementioned scoffing in the rant. Again, if you can’t deal with getting hit on at a club, DONT. FUCKING. GO.
3. Herren has it right — straight people walking into a gay bar just make it confusing for the people that are there to hook up with members of the same sex; ESPECIALLY when they’re too drunk to realize they’re being hit on.
4. Kind of a side topic, but I’ll state it again. ANYONE grabbing ANYONE’S ass when not privy to it deserves a swift elbow to the fucking face.
I’m standing in a line at G Bar in New York with 40 other gay men waiting to get in. Drunk straight chick (with her shamed gay friend in tow) marches from the back of the line, saying: “I don’t have to wait in this line, I’m STRAIGHT!” The bouncer sent her right back to the end of the line, which erupted in CHEERS!
Moral of the story: drunk straight chicks really DO believe they are in a socially and morally superior position and that they should be given unearned privilege wherever they go. Their patronizing, tired, outdated sneering at gay men is such a downer that I just don’t want to be around it.
And, in addition, Sex and the City (both movies) sucked. The bad girls love it only because they think it validates their lack of understanding of the basics of social behavior, respect for others, and common decency.
I’m a straight man and I go to gay bars all the time. I have members of my family that are homosexual and the girl I am seeing currently has a homosexual best friend so we go to a gay club in the city all the time. I go because I wanna spend time with my friends in a setting that doesn’t bother me too much. I’ve been to straight clubs and I have to say they aren’t nearly as fun. I have the utmost respect for the gay community and I for one will be the first
to defend any homsexual enduring prejudice or descrimination. I don’t see the big deal if a straight man goes to have a good time? I’ve had some of the best conversations of my life with homosexuals.
Why cant i go to a gay bar if i’m not gay.. I not gonna scold you or get offended if a woman someone hits on me.. I just want to check one out, kinda getting tired out creepy guys trying to hit on me.Plus I dont go to bars to meet men, just to have a good time and drink. lol.